Knocking out my baby to the soundtrack of a Gary Barlow and Claire from Steps duet would have been a new lockdown low.
The mishap, though, set the tone for the rest of a day where I was, almost exclusively, useless as a human being.
Lockdown is shit.
I should, though, probably wait until lockdown measures are further loosened before I ask Chris Martin if he’s up for recording a fundraising single.
I went over to the tree and, with no plan, just stuck the chainsaw aimlessly into the middle of it.

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